What do you want the most?

5 years ago I decided to pursue my doctoral degree. I was rejected. 4 times!

I set a goal to myself to pursue my post graduate research studies, started working on it for months. The first time I got the rejection email, I was afraid. The first thing that came into my mind was that I was not good enough, I was not good enough for this university, I was not good enough to carry on with my studies.

After working over 6 months on my proposal, I felt lost, stuck, and had no idea what to do, that rejection left me struggling.

The thought of quitting came quickly into my mind. But one evening, and while I was browsing through my LinkedIn feed, I found someone who finished from the same school I was applying for. I immediately tried to contact him, explaining my situation. What he explained to me at the time changed the way I look at things. He said "what the university is trying to tell you is keep on trying". It was a wake up call, that sentence cleared my clouded thinking. I then decided I will not give up until every single school have turned me down. Long story short, I am in my last year through my studies. To me, passing that first hurdle, that was a success.

Human's most powerful drive is our instinct to survive. And success is an integral part of that drive, but...

what is success anyway?

The dictionary defines success as the fact of becoming rich or famous or of getting a high social position. Which fundamentally translates success in its most common context as related to either an increase in wealth or social status.

In other words, society would like us to understand success as the opposite of failure

That is a bit of a broad brush definition don't you think?

Your definition of success should not necessarily be my definition of success, yes probably the guidelines are similar.

Then why would we pursue success?

Success is an individual feel of gratification that may be continually changing.

It is doing whatever you do, giving your best, without holding back. Its not about outcomes, it is about the effort and energy spent.

It will ultimately be you who will decide if you succeed.

If success is simply the achievement of a set goal, does that mean failure is the opposite of success? Does that mean not attaining your set goals is considered a failure?

You see, no one can control the outcomes, but we can control the effort and energy we put to achieve that outcome. If we do our best to achieve our purpose with passion intention, we have already succeeded.

I am not claiming to know what success looks like, I probably can advice on failure though!

The fear is when we become slaves for the chase of our own "success". If you let your measure to success be defined by others, then you are doomed to a lifetime of slavery, misery!

Select your goals based on the impact of your success, either limited, personal, or high impact affecting many lives.

You might find success in binge watching a full series on Netflix in a weekend!

Failures should not define us, it is how we handle them that should.

Define your own success, because if you don't, you will never get it!